Note to future self: Being yourself is harder than you think. You are not your victories, nor defeat. Not your opinions, nor an ideology.

It is easy to think being yourself is easy, but in reality it's an act of sheer will as Hammond would say. If 2 people say you are doing something right, even if you are not, it will waiver your opinion of what right means. If a 100 or 10,000 people say something about you in unison you will definitely believe it. It works the same way if you are doing something wrong.

We are wired to agree with the masses, there's utility to it. They are usually pretty spot on with their assestment. But too much of outside opinion intruding on your own thougts will leave you lost and bewildered. Yes there are a lot of valid opinions out there, and you need not assess all of them.

Identity is like maths,  it is hard to say whether it is invented or discovered. Probably a bit of both.

Long story short

Probably a good litmus test of your identity is not about your hobbies, dreams or nightmares. They help but they are not it. It's the decision to not do something in the moment, being more conscentious to that inner voice, that carves out an identity out of a blithering primate with an overdeveloped frontal lobe.

Just know that the next time you feel too carried away, will you?